Couture for Thought

Shirt: GAP // Lipstick: M.A.C.’s Girl About Town

Guys.. I’m back! Are you excited?

What is this nonsense doing on a fashion/personal style blog you ask? Because your outer image extends past what clothes you are wearing and if they are in season or not. It includes your outfit, makeup, hair — the entire package. I have not seen many people tackle the issue of black, or ethnic, hair care on a fashion forward blog. For me, since this is right up there with how I am going to be wearing my makeup for the day, I felt that it was necessary to open up this post for comments, concerns, and even products for other people to try in order to solve the issue of what to do.

Caring for black hair, albeit natural or relaxed, is a difficult challenge. If it is relaxed, like mine is, it is even MORE challenging finding the right concoctions of leave-in moisturizers, smoothing serums, and heating tools to keep it the way that it is portrayed in the media.

I grew up not knowing how to even begin to tackle my hair. I am of mixed descent (white and black) and was told growing up that I had ‘good hair’. I’m not exactly sure what that meant, but when I noticed that I had hair down to my back and other children that had the same type of hair as me did not, that clued me in. My mother started giving me relaxers when I was 5 years old, and every day that I wish she did not. My hair was left in a state where it was brittle, unhealthy, and abused even further past the chemical processing with hot combs that are heated by the coils of your stove and curling irons that when curled too tight left you amusing burns on your scalp and against your forehead if you dare twitched.

Why did black – no, ETHNIC – women with a coarse hair type get left with the torture act when it comes down to maintaining our hair? All of the African American women that we face in media today – including, but not limited to, Tyra Banks, Halle Berry, Zoe Saldana – have the relaxer hair style. It is very rare that we see a celebrity that is wearing a natural hairstyle that isn’t revealed as a very expensive and extensive lace front weave. As influenced by the media as my mother was to have my relaxers done at such a young age, I made the conscious decision as an adult to keep getting relaxers as an easier solution rather than shaving my hair to my new growth (virgin hair) and starting completely au naturale.

I started my journey three years ago after having enough of D.I.Y. glue-in extensions and hair that could not lie flat no matter how many times I pressed a flat iron to it. The first thing was when my boyfriend presented me with a CHI flat iron which was the be all of straighteners when he purchased it. The next step was going to my local ethnic hair dresser for her to fix the mess that I had started which started with a relaxer and ended with multiple trimmings that spanned six months in an attempt to get my hair to the point where it was healthy enough to avoid buzzing. I have grown somewhat since then and have figured out what products keep my hair at bay, but I have educated myself to the point where I have realized that I do not need a relaxer every month when, with the right care, I can stretch my hair out to where I only do relaxers every 4-6 months.

Now, I am not saying that having relaxer hair is the way to go by any means. There are many women that choose to bypass the harsh chemicals and keep their hair natural which I admire. It is just now how I am able to manage with my hair. I cannot even say that my hair is even as healthy as it could be or the pinnacle example of hair care.  I am simply expanding on the idea that there is a stigma surrounding ethnic hair care that clearly reads that is difficult and to go to a professional. While that may be true for some or most situations if you need to get your hair back on the right path, but afterward? Maybe you don’t need to aside from trimmings. Maybe you will have to do the testing phase of other hair products to see what is the best thing for you. My hair becomes unmanageable in the rain. I am still afraid to work out because I know that if I do too much cardio that I will “sweat my perm out” and will find myself standing in front of a mirror for two hours to fix the damage post shampoo. I will do my best between food and fashion posts to give you reviews on products that I know have helped me along and even new ones. I really, really want to see what the new craze of dry shampoo will do to my hair.

Feel free to ask any questions in the comments below or comment on some things that have helped you if it applies! I can also receive emails at coutureforthought@gmail.com and perhaps if I get enough I can make a collective post of Q&A!